Hana ni Arashi

"when the flower blooms, the storm comes over"
for the first time in my life. reality hits me harder than ever
i realize now...larger than life that-
i don't really belong anywhere.
it has become a pattern that-
i welcome a new friend into our circle.
at first im their closest friend
and slowly, they are more and more distant
and i see them somewhere else
only talking to say 'hi'
now..i think i might as well say 'bye' because i don't really belong anywhere.
not in the states, not here. because my best friend is taken and gone elsewhere.
so I ask you. where am I in this picture?
and the old memories pierce my heart.
Everything seemed too good to be real.
and I was right.
i feel as if there is no deep relationship between my friends and I except to rant on someone.
its all just surface feelings.
which brings me to my new discussion topic.
miss A and mister B? together?
ew.
seriously...
too old, too young, too quick, too inexperienced, too player, too flirty, too revengeful. those apply to either one or the other of this pairing. am i right or what?
-Tainted
oh god i sound so emo. lalalalalaa. but seriously. if you were me, u'd feel that way too.

mmm..nonono

you got it all wrong, dear.
thats wat i mean
im ignored
you didnt even mention the part above. or are you avoiding it?
im not trying to pick a fight
but im just saying...people leave out things..and that makes things different
who said i was talking about you, anyway?
im talking about everyone cept for pearl and kev.
no..im sure im not assuming im being ignored
ur assuming that im assuming that i am being ignored
how funny is that?
because i KNOW im being ignored...
not necessarily intentional...
but that says a lot about my impact on everyone else's lives.
and no thanks
i dont need ur apology.
but thanks anyways.
dont always assume im talking about you here. ^^ just to lighten things.
oh yea.
i said that i know how it feels..blah blah blah...as a response to your statement before during the friday we stayed after to watch the sports.
of course i know you know how it feels.
thats cuz i remember what you say, cuz i always listen closely. ^^

-Tainted

Nobody's Listening-Linkin Park

(Tried to give you warning but everyone ignores me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)
(Called to you so clearly but you
don’t want to hear me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress
Head full of anger, held in my chest
And everything left’s a waste of time
I hate my rhymes, but hate everyone else’s more
I’m riding on the back of this pressure
Guessing that it’s better I
can’t keep myself together
Because all of this stress gave
me something to write on
The pain gave me something I could set my sights on
Never forget the blood sweat and tears
The uphill struggle over years the fear and
Trash talking and the people it was to
And the people that started it just like you

these are part of the lyrics of Nobody's Listening-Linkin Park
...
if anyone actually gets why i suddenly posted lyrics from Linkin Parks latest album...
then good for you.
you actually pay attention.
For those unfortunate souls that miss me,
the answer is in those lyrics right there.
i actually understand how good it feels like to say 'bye..im going'
and actually have someone respond.
or how happy you feel when someone cares about you.
and when you suddenly walk away, and ask-
'where are you going?'
im not really there, am i?
thank you, to pearl and kevin for being such good friends~ ^^
although sometimes i dont know what to think about you guys. = =

-Tainted

im ur # 1

♪boy i love your style, love your smile
wish that you can be only mine, be only mine
i can’t let it go, i don’t know what you’ve doing to me
ooh you’re so fine, ooh you’re so fine♪
Yea. i really hate it when i cant get over someone. i mean, really. its depressing. anyways
thats part of the lyrics to Big Bang's newest title song in Japan. Number 1.
Big Bang Fighting!!
lol
that was a short post. i know i havent been posting often but i will! just on project spazz right now. @-@ gah overwhelmed by projects. = =
-Tainted