Soul

...its been quite a while since that day, but i still want to say this...to record it in a flawless memory...he replied to one of my offline messages that day...he's been busy...im so happy...even if it is just one sentence. i am glad he hasn't forgotten me...the other him is leaving too...he just visited for around a month...he told me yesterday. he is leaving this sunday...owellz...had a feeling anyways, i wont bother to break my heart again...its the emptiness i fear...the other day, i was bored so i checked my email...the question stumped me...what do you fear? i couldnt think of anything at that time...but now, i realize...it is this loneliness i fear. i am afraid of being forgotten..i wish to stay in everyone's memory for a lifetime...nobody remembers who i am....or some dont even know me...i still feel empty...but he has regained me some of my emotions...i chatted with...haha...how many hims will i ever talk about? this is my ex-crush...last year...the incident id rather forget...its so sad...he said that i was better off with him...but....too bad he left for korea early....he knew this for a long time...its...sad....my life...does god not want me to be happy? maybe he sees this darkness inside me, and is trying to stop my plans....what a genius...party pooper....im sad.....so empty...my sarcasm...is lame and what now? nobody cares to know me...i am just a face in the hallway.